Post by BELLATRIX PROSERPINA BLACK on Dec 10, 2012 17:24:37 GMT -8
[/justify]Bellatrix Black was upset and she knew that she needed to get out of the common room, she could feel it in the very root of her bones. The clock struck eleven and she looked around, seeing that no one else was out of their room. With that in mind, Bells softly crossed the room and exited, headed down the familiar corridor that would lead her outside and ultimately lead her to the quidditch pitch. That was the only place that she felt at home these days. It seemed like there was no vein in her body that was left unmarked by her hatred for the past week. Every time she looked in the mirror, she saw someone different looking back; someone plagued by the ghost of her past...someone that was confused about everything that she once stood for. Bells had once believed that there was nothing that she could do wrong in the world, but lately she had come to discover that she had hurt the ones that were closest to her. She had hurt Zeke. She had hurt him badly and she had seen it the other night in the common room. Running her hands through her dark hair, she shook it past her shoulder and continued on her way out of the castle.
It wasn’t long before she made it to the pitch. She stopped on the sidelines of the field, admiring the grandiose hoops that surrounded the edges. Quidditch was her favorite thing in the world and as of late, it was the only thing that made sense. It was the only thing in her life with rules and boundaries...it was the only thing that remained stable. It was the only thing that she could love and not have to worry about it loving her in return because...Quidditch couldn’t feel. It was inanimate. Bells was beginning to think that she couldn’t really feel either. ‘Perhaps you’re inanimate?’ Her mind seemed to say, teasing her. The words hurt just the same; it would do her well to always remember that.
Her eyes drifted to the entrance toward the locker rooms and Bells immediately went in that direction. She just wanted to shower and be by herself for a little while. She wanted to sit and feel nothing. Slowly she pushed open the door and walked into the room. Almost immediately she was calmed by the smell of leather and broom polish. The locker rooms were her safe-haven and she knew it. They kept her sane when it felt as if everything else was crumbling around her. She crossed to the side of the room where her locker was and threw it open. Her fingertips passed over the moving photos that were adhered to the inside of the door: A picture of her and her sisters at last years Quidditch finals, a picture of her and Zeke during a semi-final game this summer, and finally an obligatory picture of Rod Lestrange - she only kept it up for appearances sake. She gave too long of a glance to the photograph of her and Zeke and immediately felt the sides of her eyes burn. For a moment, she wasn’t sure what the feeling was. Her fingertips reached up and brushed the corners of her eyes only to find that they were slightly wet with tears, ”Dammit.” She muttered, and grabbed her towel. She slammed the locker door a little harder than she normally would have and stalked off toward the shower room.
She turned on the hot water in the room and then sat down on the bench, not bothering to get undressed yet. She wanted to wait until the water was hot enough to scald her...perhaps even burn her completely. Gently she tugged the clip out of the back of her hair, but that was when she heard the door opening with a creak, ”Beat it. Can’t you hear that someone’s in here?” She growled as she finished pulling out her hair clip. Whoever it was needed to not be here right now...she wasn’t in the mood.