Post by GAVIN CARTER JENKINS on Jan 15, 2014 12:01:19 GMT -8
The one thing that Gavin noticed was Eileen’s blush. A part of him felt proud for being the one who put it there. He almost laughed out loud at it, but repressed it as to not embarrass her. He wasn’t used to making people blush… he was usually the one who did so, much to his chagrin. He didn’t know many people who thought a man blushing was attractive. Most girls he knew who made him blush merely laughed and said how ‘cute’ it was. He doubted he knew many men who wanted to be called ‘cute.’However, her response caught Gavin off-guard and his impulse was to pull her into a kiss, do something bold like that, but his insecurities kept him back. Instead he grinned at her like he was a teenager all over again. Oh God, then he remembered that she was still a teenager. Any thought of making a move went even further out the window. He wanted to be comfortable with his age, he really did. If she was just a year older, if she was just getting out of Hogwarts… perhaps then he would be comfortable and he could tell people that she was just graduating and the like. Instead, he felt himself attracted to a girl who couldn’t even legally Apparate yet, who couldn’t get a drink at the bar. All those thoughts made Gavin frustrated in many ways. He couldn’t help though, but wonder if she was talking about them at that very moment. He wondered if his attraction to her could be perceived as something perverse or wrong. Maybe Gavin just thought too much.He decided to not reply to that particular remark. The next one that came from her made him laugh all over again. It just sounded so dirty. Was she intending on being flirtatious, or was she ignorant to the words that came from her mouth? He couldn’t find a single flirty thing to say back. Oh God, he was so bad at this. Instead he took her words the literal way that he imagined that she had intended. “Trust me, I’ve tried. I can’t even bring myself to fire her, either. All the applicants I’ve received… they’d be no better than she is. They’re all women at the Ministry that I know who want to transfer offices, for reasons that I don’t know. They don’t have any experience, either, with any Magical Sports or organizations. Besides, she’s got kids and, how could I do something like that to a mother? Maybe I’m not meant to be Head of an office if I can’t even fire or hire my staff.” He had gone depressive without meaning to. He felt as if any moment Eileen would claim that she had to head back as a polite way to get away from his horrible conversational skills.Gavin watched as Eileen’s light eyes scanned his papers. “If only you were older, I’d probably just hire you,” he said playfully, although he was actually dead serious. Even the fact that she seemed interested in the documents made her a potentially better secretary than the one he currently had. The funniest part was that he could actually imagine Eileen at a desk. The job didn’t even necessarily have to be a desk job. Perhaps even an assistant. Assistant seemed like a better term. There were so many things that he could get an assistant to do other than just answer the mail… well, as long as they knew the information enough.“Yeah, I suppose it is,” he said as he carefully edge a little closer. He watched her as her eyes slid up his arms and he felt a little self-conscious. The way she was looking at him seemed edgy, almost expectant. He didn’t want to let her down, he didn’t want to build something that he knew he would only destroy. Gavin felt as if the feelings he had toward Eileen were reciprocated, but he couldn’t get himself past her age. Perhaps he was being immature about it, but on the other hand he couldn’t ignore his gut feelings. So badly did he want to touch her face, to kiss her deeply, to get to know her over countless coffee-and-tea dates, but he couldn’t do it. Almost as soon as he caught her gaze he looked away. “Eileen, I…” he paused as he didn’t even know what he wanted to say. “Never mind. You’re right, though. Things never seem fair in love.” He had never even been in love before. Relationships? Sure, but nothing he would call love.